My full-time job is in an office/warehouse building. It is a small firm, with approximately 14 employees and contractors, of which male/female ratio is 10/4. We have a normal set-up with bathrooms, one for men, one for women.

The latest hire was about 2 months ago, a business development/project manager. From day 1 he has been a strange bird and a management problem from an employee bad habits perspective. However, he has also shown himself to be a lazy slob. How do I know? He utilizes the ladies room, because it’s right across from his office. He cannot walk the 30 yards across the building to the men’s room. No, he has been using the ladies room, leaving the seat up until I put a pointed note in there about it, paper towels on the floor, the sink and counter wet, the soap dripping all over the place, and basically riffling through the stuff we girls keep in there. It is seriously creepy; there is a mens room and a ladies room for good reasons.

At first we were not sure who was using our bathroom, but we did notice that the seat was being left up and the overall mess was happening. We 4 ladies have been together and sharing this bathroom for more than 5 years; we are all courteous and tidy. After receiving complaints from the other 3 women in my office, I posted a pointed note that if they must use our facilities, please respect that it is for LADIES and act accordingly. We hoped that might shame the perpetrator into using the mens room instead.

Nope. For about 2 weeks it was better, none of us found the seat up but the slob factor of paper towels on the floor, water all over the counters, soap left dripping on or into the sink seemed to get worse every single day. Finally, after finding the seat up twice last week and twice on Monday (when I was the only woman in the building), I had HAD it. And because I was upset to the point of being incapable of speaking to him about this situation without getting a very shrill, bitchy edge to my tone of voice, I requested he be moved to an empty office on the other side of the building and told by his supervisor to start using the mens facilities. To their credit the senior PMs were shocked to learn he had been using the ladies room routinely; at least they were kind enough to not suggest we ladies are overreacting.

M thinks the guy is some kind of weird, but he also feels I lose corporate respect points for having a male PM talk to him. Perhaps I do, but M has never understood the culture of our tiny little firm. I am pretty secure in my overall position and with the respect, trust, and rapport I have built with the owners as well as the staff. I would hope this dumbass would step-up and get into the groove of the culture of our office. Overall we tend to be too laid back and too patient and allow too much flexibility for our employees, and with the troubles this guy has had thus far, I do not foresee a successful future with us unless a few things change.

Right now I will be happy just to have our ladies bathroom back to being used by just ladies.

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