My brain is on overload with the idea of GOALS. I feel as if I have none, or they are so modest I have forgotten.

I have my to-do lists. I have numerous projects in process and can tell you quite succinctly where I am with every business-related task for each and every client. A basic premise of work is to ensure it’s done correctly, within budget, and delivered before deadline. I do not see that as a goal. I see that as a basic fact of life in self-employment.

In the rest of my life, I feel rather rudder-less and goal-less. Let us pick an easy one – health and fitness. I meet with J twice weekly now, yet I have no real or imaginary goal out there. In response to my plaintive lament on the topic, J sent me a Bruce Lee quote: “A goal is not always meant to be achieved, it often serves simply as something to aim at.” Okay, this is good. So does that mean just close my eyes and drag myself into the gym and through this week’s routines as perfectly as possible and everything else will (eventually) fall into place?

I just don’t know. I spent my lunch break seeking the internet’s best advice for training goal setting and got nowhere. Perhaps I shall continue down my blind pathway of doing the exercises and movements J dreams up for me and be happy about succeeding. Maybe my goal is to continue to keep crazy brain on muted lockdown and negative thinking at bay while going through each exercise, each set. Put that way, it sounds like a splendid goal.

Work is time consuming and for the most part absorbing and interesting. It keeps me fully occupied and then some, if I allowed it. The thought of another hobby is starting to take root in my head. Friend Judy knits and crochets; I have counted cross stitch waiting for some attention. I have lately I have been sucked into television viewing while sitting and folding clothes or doing whatever limited amount of cardio I choose to perform. I also love to read and have been utilizing my kindle unlimited subscription to read a lot of books that I would never actually purchase. Counted cross stitch while watching TV? Or maybe reading while arc training?

I think my brain is kind of bored and wants something new. I have no idea what. Maybe it’s time to break out the guns and go to the range and blast the stagnant cobwebs away while aiming at paper targets.

I am currently reading a book on meditation. That’s also something to try – slowing down my mind and letting it get some restive peace. Learning to meditate as a goal? There are surely worse things or places I could aspire to achieve. I might learn how to let go of the drive to set some goals.

2 thoughts on “Goals

  1. ‘Tis the season of goal setting – my birthday is right after the first of the year and I set goals – not resolutions! On the training goal – D for ages encouraged me to have a goal and I just couldn’t get very specific because I didn’t feel like I knew what was possible. Now I have a number – completely arbitrary really. But really it is a look/feeling. And so I stumble through the exercise unable to necessarily articulate what the goal is but knowing that I will know it when I see it. That may be what is best for you – unless you want to resurrect that gold lame bikini one. šŸ˜‰

    I’m not big on meditation – can’t get my brain to be quiet! But I did some guided yoga meditation – Yoga Nidra and found that surprisingly refreshing and easy to focus on. I’m trying to incorporate that in my life more.

    I like your idea about being creative and creating something – feeds the multitasking need (can’t just watch TV!). Maybe a goal is to try x things and see what you like/don’t.

    1. I think I agree with you, J, and Bruce Lee – I just need some target to aim at. Right now for fitness it’s let’s move on to the next level or set of exercise movements or weights or whatever. It’s all good for me, no matter what, and as long as I can do enough and keep my eating in check and stay off the insulin, it’s going to be fine. Actually, that’s sort of the primary goal – stay off the insulin.
      I think my brain is getting bored with these foundational basics we have been covering and building upon. I marvel how far I have come in the glute bridges and squats and lunges and deadlifts. I still struggle with pushups and planks, still have to remind myself every freaking day to unshrug my shoulders, tighten abs/glutes, etc. But I pick up a 10 lb. DB and it doesn’t feel like all that much, same with the KBs I have been using. I am stronger. For whatever reason I just don’t really BELIEVE I am stronger.

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